Okay. It's time to be real.
Blogger, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter. You name it. Anything social media.
We are on them. A lot.
(In denial? Think you're the exception? Well guess what? You're reading a blog. Right now.)
We spend hours stalking other people's lives.
Dreaming of having them.
Planning ridiculously extravagant weddings, outfits, crafts, meals, and homes to live in.
All things that we'll never end up having.
(And by we, I mean, me...and I just hope I'm not the only one.)
Anyway, like I said, I'm a stalker.
I admit it.
And, I like to think that I'm pretty dang good at it.
Facebook stalking may, or may not be one of my favorite pastimes.
(you can ask Hanna and Sarah about that...)
Well. Stalking leads to something.
The same thing.
EVERY SINGLE TIME.
You'd think I'd learn?
Yeah, nope.
I guess I have a hard head.
You're probably wondering,
"what is this crazy woman talking about?!"
Well, I'll let you in on my craziness.
It boils down to one word
One TEN LETTER word.
We are all guilty of it.
It is inevitable.
It starts at a young age.
Who is tallest?
Who is the skinniest?
Who is the most tan?
Who has the best nails?
Who has their hair done the cutest?
Who has the best clothes?
Cutest backpack?
Cutest folders?
Best pencils?
(Maybe those last few are just me, but I always looked at the simple stupid things like folders and pencils. I come from a frugal family--the best kind. Sale items were, and still are, our favorite.)
As I've gotten older, the comparisons haven't changed too much.
But more have been added on.
Who has the best lap top?
The best phone?
The cutest phone case?
Who has the cutest room décor?
The cutest handwriting?
The most friends on FB, or followers on Blogger, Insta or Twitter?
Who cooks the best?
Eats the least?
Exercises the most?
Has the best body?
Who sings the prettiest?
Who is the most popular?
Who does that super cute boy decide to sit next to in class?
(Never me. Usually it's by some other insanely attractive males.)
Who takes the best pictures?
The MOST pictures?
Who gets the most likes on their posts?
Whose posts does that super cute boy decide to like?
Who has the cutest boyfriend?
Who has the best love story?
The prettiest engagement ring?
The list goes on and on.
But here is the problem.
We are constantly comparing things that we see as our weaknesses,
to things we see as others strengths.
Things that we feel we lack,
to things we think others have.
Or vice-versa.
We view other people's lives as perfect, and our own as mediocre at best.
And the online world doesn't help us with that!
We see the best and brightest spots of everyone's lives.
I mean, who would find the ugliest picture they have of themselves, and post it?
Not me.
Who posts about their failed attempt at making a new craft, food, or decoration?
Not me.
In short:
Who posts about their weaknesses, shortcomings, or failures?
NOT ME.
And why not?
The answer is simple;
Because that is not what other people want to read.
And our society has become all about pleasing other people.
I'm not trying to say that everyone should post ugly pictures, and only about their failures.
Honestly, I'm one of the "other people" that wouldn't waste my time reading those.
I'm not trying to say we should stop stalking other people,
I know I won't stop anytime soon.
What I AM trying to say is that we have created a false sense of reality for ourselves.
We hold ourselves to a standard we have made for ourselves,
based on someone else's life.
We try and become someone we're not, so that we can be "accepted".
But, here's my question,
By who?
By that little old lady in China who comes across your blog, and will NEVER meet you?
(no offense to little old ladies in China.)
By the flock of other women who are also attempting to make their lives into something they're not?
By a man, who is almost positively not going to read your blog?
(shout out to any men who are actually reading this.)
Why does it matter how many friends/followers you have online?
Or how many of them like your post?
Why is technology SO important?
Why do we let those things boost or ruin our self-esteem?
I've been asking myself these questions lately.
And I don't have answers to all of them.
And I don't know how to make them NOT be of such great importance to me.
It is hard!
But let me share one thing I HAVE learned, just real quick:
There is no such thing as a perfect life!
From here on, I am on a journey.
A journey to stop searching for a perfect life.
A journey to stop comparing myself to others.
A journey to become comfortable and confident with the woman I am.
No matter who social media deems me to be.
And it is going to be a process.
Step by step.
One thing at a time.
But, I know I can do it.
And why? Because I know I have someone to help me every step of the way.
I KNOW that I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father.
And I KNOW that I was created by His hands, and in His image.
And I KNOW that He loves me, for who I am.
Even my red hair.
Even my millions (or billions, or trillions) of freckles.
Even my big thighs.
Even my lack of height.
Even all of those "blemishes" that bother me.
And I KNOW that He wants me to be happy.
With the person that I am,
and with the life that I have been blessed with.
My "journey" has begun.
Care to join me?
